To coincide with the FIFA Soccer World Cup, Walkers (the British name for Lay's) have released 15 unappealing-sounding flavors of their potato chips, each one influenced by a different country. I ignored the temptation of Australian BBQ Kangaroo and shunned the frankly shocking sounding English Roast Beef and Yorkshire Pudding for a packet of American Cheeseburger.
Coming in a multipack bag wittily titled "Americas United", along with Brazilian Salsa and Argentinean Flame Grilled Steak, the Cheeseburger packet immediately stands out with its stars and stripes printed across the packet. "This must be how all the food in America is packaged," I assure myself, before opening the bag with an excitement usually saved for special occasions.
The first thing I do is smell them. It smells like Special Sauce. That unmistakable vinegary, sweet, and dill-packed scent hits your nostrils hard and takes you straight under the Golden Arches. A taste reveals the smokiness of paprika and a slight tang of burnt caramel, but apart from these anomalous notes it's just like eating a burger from the world's number one fast-food chain. Not just that though: It's like eating your first ever McDonald's adult meal, the first step up from the Happy Meal; your fast-food Bar Mitzvah. A few more bites and the synthetic, yet oddly pleasant taste of a Kraft Single starts coming through, along with the sourness of dill pickles. By the end of the packet I realize what it actually tastes like: a particularly fearsome McBurp.
I won't be eating these again.
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