Zach Brooks on the Deadliness (and Deliciousness) of the Schnitzel Burger


[Photograph: Robyn Lee]

Zach Brooks of New York City-based Midtown Lunch finally tries the Schnitzel Burger from the Schnitzel Truck and likes it. A lot. But he doesn't glorify the deliciousness without also expounding upon the deadliness of this grease-laden burger (which we sort of overlooked), especially as the burger sits:

Just one warning... you don't want to let this thing sit. There is no question that if you eat more than one of these things a month you will die. And not at the ripe old age of 75. I mean if you eat 12 or more of these burgers in a one year period you... will... die. Your heart will stop working, before it even has time to warn you that what you are doing is wrong. And letting the burger sit in the bag while you walk back to the office will just quicken that process. You need to eat it immediately. Will juice run down your face? Yes. Will a greasy film cover your hands for the rest of the day? Yes. Will people walk by on the street and point at you in disgust? No. More than likely they will attempt to avert their eyes instead. But better to have grease on your hands, and face (and shirt sleeves in my case) than in your arteries. Because that is where it will all end up if you let this thing 'rest' for any significant period of time. It's like the opposite of a fine wine. Time doesn't make it better... just more deadly.

Despite all that, Zach says it's still worth eating. I'll say yes too, although I sort of wish I had worn gloves while eating the burger so the smell wouldn't stay with me all day.

Related: Grilled: Zach Brooks of Midtown Lunch