We haven't done a weekend book giveaway in AHT-Serious Eats land in a while. And as I was looking up some historical burger info on Friday, I realized that we have a nice little stack of Josh Ozerksy's recent book, The Hamburger: A History.
As I said in an earlier review of Ozersky's book, "In five easy chapters, Ozersky handily deals with the contentious origins of the burger—which world culture spawned it and who invented the version we know today?—and then takes the reader on a fast-paced journey from the ramshackle hamburger stands of the early 1900s to White Castle (the original king of fast food) to the '50s and '60s, which see the rise and consolidation of the burger giants we know all too well today."
I see this giveaway as a nice little bookend (no pun intended) to the summer grilling/burger season, as we gave away a burger book just as summer began.
As in that earlier contest (for Hamburger America), I'm going to make you work for it. To win The Hamburger, all you have to do is COMPOSE A HAMBURGER ACROSTIC POEM in the comments here. The best five acrostic poems, as determined by the AHT staff, win.
For those of you who failed English, an acrostic poem looks like this:
Hearty Awesome Meaty Buns Undeniably juicy Rare to medium-rare Good to the last bite Eat one every day Readers of AHT love them!
My acrostic pretty much blows, but it gives you an example. You needn't use the word hamburger; feel free to use any word for your acrostic that evokes hamburgerness. Go!
Comments will close at 12 p.m. ET on Tuesday, September 2. One entry per person. I am recusing myself from judging; the other folks at AHT-Serious Eats will determine winners. The standard Serious Eats contest rules apply.
Heavy on the ketchup
Ample napkins
Mustard is right out
Brioche is best
Unalienable right
Rich in bun-ly goodness
Gussy it up with sharp cheddar
Even better with bacon
Restrain from poking!
Lean meat is the enemy
Every artery deserves a clog
Required pairing: vanilla shake
Tantalizing aroma
Happiness on a bun
Ecstasy-inducing
Palate-pleasing
Edible paradise
Ridiculously delicious
French fries' best friend
Eaten eagerly
Can't live without 'em
Try one with blue cheese
Fix me one now
Onions, please
Order often
Don't touch it or you'll get stabbed with my fork
Somedays
The exchange student
Under the Rising Sun
Desired the
Yellow mustard, the red ketchup, the beauty of
A
Burger to
Remind her
Of
America.
Despite her love of
Japanese cuisine and culture,
And the
Pleasures they could offer...
A bite of juicy beef between two buns
Never failed to renew and bolster
Her strength and
Offer a cure to the
Missing home and the other
Side of the world.
It was a simple
Cure and
Kept her hunger at bey.
Nippon wa itusomo omoshiroi desukedo...
Eating
Something
So
Craveably
Unctuous
Refreshed the homesick exchange student
Extending her strength, warming her soul.
Help me
All I think about is burgers.
Maybe I should eat something else,
But they're so tasty
Unless you do something dumb like make them out of chicken.
Really now, chicken?
Get yourself some prime beef or maybe
Even buffalo.
Round patties of goodness.
Read what I need
Eat so much to show my greed
Did I say rare with salt, pepper and pickles
Mustard can be added for a few tickles
Each one to be quickly griddled
As simple as this you won't be riddled
Thought this might rhyme, but I would only burp!
Habit formed from age five
A grill on the back lawn
My mother patting fresh meat
Burgers sizzling in the summer sun
Up and down the tree i climbed
Ready to eat and eager to try
Gigantic burgers, too large for my girl mouth
Everyone laughing as three-year-old me stuffed
Round, juicy, perfect adult-sized burger...and always asked for seconds!
SORRY - misprint on the last poem
Habit formed from age five
A grill on the back lawn
My mother patting fresh meat
Burgers sizzling on the grill in the summer sun
Up and down the tree I climbed
Ready to eat and eager to try
Gigantic burgers, too large for my girl mouth
Everyone laughing as five-year-old me stuffed away
Round, juicy, perfect adult-sized burgers... and always asked for seconds!
Humble treat, so quickly consumed,
Awesome goodness, in my stomach entombed.
Mild never, its flavors exceed,
Buns crusted in a delicate seed.
Until devoured by a wood fire's edge,
Real devotion can not truly be pledged.
Goodness enriched by lettuce and tomatoes,
Elevated to manna with french fried potatoes.
Rightly appreciated as a patty of perfection,
Sizzling and hot, time for me to do an inspection!
Hidden beneath white
American fluffy roll, ketchup,
Mustard lies the
Broiled, flame-licked,
Undercooked to perfection
Round sphere of
Ground beef bleeding juice but
Easily eaten lifted in eager hands to
Ravenous jaws.
Can't
Help believing
Every burger
Eventually needs
Some cheddar
Engulfment to make it
Better.
Uncheesy patty action
Rarely
Gets
Eaten with any
Real satisfaction
Blackened on the grill
Its smell makes my stomach rumble
Going to be the highlight of my day
The sweet and succulent meat
Has such a classic feel
It can be served both plain or with lots of fixins'
Can't hold out much longer for this tasty treat
Ketchup, mustard, or mayo
Just deciding can be a trial
Unless you only like it one way only
It's great to mix it up a bit
Can top with simple things like tomatos, onions, and lettuce
You want something classier add some portabello instead
Can't stop there then add horseradish or some guac or even bacon
Has to be good no matter what
Everyone loves them
Everyone craves them
Silly vegetarians even make fake tofu ones
Extremely delicious
Bet you can't say 'no' to one
Unless you're from another planet
Right now you are reading this and craving one
Got to get one now
Even if it's midnight
Run out and buy one, but don't sacrafice and buy McDonalds.
Can I has cheezburger?
Artery blocker of my dreams,
Ruminating in my tummy.
Never raw, always sunning.
Illicitly grilling my
Vixen of meat.
Oh me, oh my. Onion
Rings or french fries on the sly,
Excellent cheezburger I can has inside.
Health is of no concern with a burger in hand;
Angioplasty is something other people need.
Meat is good for you, right?
Buns and pickles and mustard too.
Utter joy comes from chowing down.
Red rivulets of ketchup drip from your chin.
Gorging yourself of a heavenly feast,
Everything else seems so unimportant.
Ready for another?
Cyprus sure, cheddar pure, purrrrr
Hot juicy halloumi
Effluence
Enticing me
Succulent meat sizzle
Excitement
Bubbling within me
Unctuous
Ribald
God it's good
Every time
Really
Buns of steel ....hard or soft
Usual suspects .....ketchup and pickles
Red in the middle ....crispy sides
Great with fries ....or an onion or two
Excellent meal ....or tasty snack
Roundly firm .....or squished down flat
Loved by all ....except the vegans
I want one now .....another later
Chips are good ....inside the bun
I love burgers .....plain is great
One for hubby .....two for me
Use a grill ....or a dark fry pan
Spread the table ....burgers are done !
Heaven on a bun
Another one just cause the first tasted so good
Mary love of god ... are you putting what on that burger
Broiled over an open flame, cause we love the smoke
Unbelievable as a first bite, Sad and missed as a last bite
Right off the grill, juices running down your chin
Grinning ear to ear with that meat juice shiny smile after the first bite
Every bite is a great expierence
Ready for one more (the greatest words my dad ever said)
Have
A
Melt-in-your-mouth
Bite of bliss. You can be daring and use
Unknown ingredients or stick with the
Regulars - cheese, bacon, mayo
Go now and create a burger and
Experience the flavor of beef.
Really, stop reading...go eat!
Cannot live without
Her…
Every time I say “love”
Evokes
Something
Else:
BURGERS! I LOVE CHEESEBURGERS!
Ultimate union of beef (juicy) cheese (gooey) bun (squishy)
Red, round, ridiculously right
Girl, I got to
Eat!
(Raises cheeseburger to mouth)
Recipies,
Everybody has one, but
Doubt that
Mine can be topped
Even if your dad is a butcher
Add to a pound of premium ground beef
Three tablespoons of worstershire, carmelized
Onion and some bleu cheese, but
Not too much, enough for three patties
And throw them on a hot grill 'til they're almost
Black on the outside and slightly
Undercooked in the middle
Now that's good eatin'
Title:
H aving
A
Major
B reakdown
Understandably
R equires
G enerous
E picurean
R emedies
H aving a major breakdown in my ability to cope
A nother grim day of meaningless work
M ost of which serves the wrong master.
B rutal workplaces drive calorically desperate deeds.
U nder these circumstances, fortunately, one finds
R emedies at one’s fingertips, ranging from the rather
G raceless yet anatomically correct McDonald’s Double Cheeseburger,
E dible yet unsatisfying, to the
R apturous Ghetto Burger at Miss Ann’s Snack Bar in ATL.
Hot off the grill
Add some catsup on top
Moist and delicious
Bun to hold it
Unless I am full, I will eat two
Real tasty
Great for lunch
Eat them whenever I can
Real crowd pleaser
Hey man!
Ahhh! Get back here with my burger!
Man that double cheeseburger cost me one
Buck!
U little thief! I hope you
Realize I know exactly who you are, that cape ain't foolin' no one!
Geez if your family saw you now they would
Lower their head in shame
Either that, or
Ronald would fire your ass
M eat lovingly loose
E aten savoring
D ripping juices
I ncomparably beefy
U ndeniable comfort
M elted gooey cheese
R ed onion and bacon
A perfect bun to burger
R atio completes the quest
E xhalted Burger Rules!
Astonishing
Notable
In-n-out
Mouth-watering
Amazing
Lots of secret sauce
Seared griddled goodness
Tasty
Yearning
Left Coast and I live on the East Coast!
Every day I dream of getting there again...one day.
B est eaten with some ketchup
U nder the radiance of summer light and next to the grill
R are and with melted cheese
G reets my mouth and transforms me to a
E uphoric state that brings
R apture and ecstasy. How fine!
Print
We haven't done a weekend book giveaway in AHT-Serious Eats land in a while. And as I was looking up some historical burger info on Friday, I realized that we have a nice little stack of Josh Ozerksy's recent book, The Hamburger: A History.
Comments are closed: 41 Comments:
Heavy on the ketchup
Ample napkins
Mustard is right out
Brioche is best
Unalienable right
Rich in bun-ly goodness
Gussy it up with sharp cheddar
Even better with bacon
Restrain from poking!
Lean meat is the enemy
Every artery deserves a clog
Required pairing: vanilla shake
fetacrackwhore at 3:53PM on 08/30/08
Tantalizing aroma
Happiness on a bun
Ecstasy-inducing
Palate-pleasing
Edible paradise
Ridiculously delicious
French fries' best friend
Eaten eagerly
Can't live without 'em
Try one with blue cheese
Fix me one now
Onions, please
Order often
Don't touch it or you'll get stabbed with my fork
holdthemayo at 4:29PM on 08/30/08
Somedays
The exchange student
Under the Rising Sun
Desired the
Yellow mustard, the red ketchup, the beauty of
A
Burger to
Remind her
Of
America.
Despite her love of
Japanese cuisine and culture,
And the
Pleasures they could offer...
A bite of juicy beef between two buns
Never failed to renew and bolster
Her strength and
Offer a cure to the
Missing home and the other
Side of the world.
It was a simple
Cure and
Kept her hunger at bey.
Nippon wa itusomo omoshiroi desukedo...
Eating
Something
So
Craveably
Unctuous
Refreshed the homesick exchange student
Extending her strength, warming her soul.
sakuraa at 4:45PM on 08/30/08
Hamburger, deluxe:
A-grade ground beef patty
Mushrooms, sauteed
Bun, toasted
U-pick your favorite cheese
Romaine leaf
Garlicky mayonnaise
Egg on top (fried)
Roasted chiles
piepie at 5:26PM on 08/30/08
Help me
All I think about is burgers.
Maybe I should eat something else,
But they're so tasty
Unless you do something dumb like make them out of chicken.
Really now, chicken?
Get yourself some prime beef or maybe
Even buffalo.
Round patties of goodness.
madball911 at 6:01PM on 08/30/08
Read what I need
Eat so much to show my greed
Did I say rare with salt, pepper and pickles
Mustard can be added for a few tickles
Each one to be quickly griddled
As simple as this you won't be riddled
Thought this might rhyme, but I would only burp!
oldsalt at 6:14PM on 08/30/08
Habit formed from age five
A grill on the back lawn
My mother patting fresh meat
Burgers sizzling in the summer sun
Up and down the tree i climbed
Ready to eat and eager to try
Gigantic burgers, too large for my girl mouth
Everyone laughing as three-year-old me stuffed
Round, juicy, perfect adult-sized burger...and always asked for seconds!
jessleigh at 6:17PM on 08/30/08
SORRY - misprint on the last poem
Habit formed from age five
A grill on the back lawn
My mother patting fresh meat
Burgers sizzling on the grill in the summer sun
Up and down the tree I climbed
Ready to eat and eager to try
Gigantic burgers, too large for my girl mouth
Everyone laughing as five-year-old me stuffed away
Round, juicy, perfect adult-sized burgers... and always asked for seconds!
jessleigh at 6:20PM on 08/30/08
Humble treat, so quickly consumed,
Awesome goodness, in my stomach entombed.
Mild never, its flavors exceed,
Buns crusted in a delicate seed.
Until devoured by a wood fire's edge,
Real devotion can not truly be pledged.
Goodness enriched by lettuce and tomatoes,
Elevated to manna with french fried potatoes.
Rightly appreciated as a patty of perfection,
Sizzling and hot, time for me to do an inspection!
etyper333 at 7:30PM on 08/30/08
Hidden beneath white
American fluffy roll, ketchup,
Mustard lies the
Broiled, flame-licked,
Undercooked to perfection
Round sphere of
Ground beef bleeding juice but
Easily eaten lifted in eager hands to
Ravenous jaws.
HeartofGlass at 8:12PM on 08/30/08
Can't
Help believing
Every burger
Eventually needs
Some cheddar
Engulfment to make it
Better.
Uncheesy patty action
Rarely
Gets
Eaten with any
Real satisfaction
Norrin2 at 8:34PM on 08/30/08
Blackened on the grill
Its smell makes my stomach rumble
Going to be the highlight of my day
The sweet and succulent meat
Has such a classic feel
It can be served both plain or with lots of fixins'
Can't hold out much longer for this tasty treat
Ketchup, mustard, or mayo
Just deciding can be a trial
Unless you only like it one way only
It's great to mix it up a bit
Can top with simple things like tomatos, onions, and lettuce
You want something classier add some portabello instead
Can't stop there then add horseradish or some guac or even bacon
Has to be good no matter what
Everyone loves them
Everyone craves them
Silly vegetarians even make fake tofu ones
Extremely delicious
Bet you can't say 'no' to one
Unless you're from another planet
Right now you are reading this and craving one
Got to get one now
Even if it's midnight
Run out and buy one, but don't sacrafice and buy McDonalds.
littleminx at 11:10PM on 08/30/08
Can I has cheezburger?
Artery blocker of my dreams,
Ruminating in my tummy.
Never raw, always sunning.
Illicitly grilling my
Vixen of meat.
Oh me, oh my. Onion
Rings or french fries on the sly,
Excellent cheezburger I can has inside.
Pineapplegate at 11:32PM on 08/30/08
Charred to perfection
Once was a bovine
Wither the “Moo”?
Lovingly nestled
On the perfect bun--
Valiant sacrifice
Eaten with honor.
gracemetcalf at 8:09AM on 08/31/08
Health is of no concern with a burger in hand;
Angioplasty is something other people need.
Meat is good for you, right?
Buns and pickles and mustard too.
Utter joy comes from chowing down.
Red rivulets of ketchup drip from your chin.
Gorging yourself of a heavenly feast,
Everything else seems so unimportant.
Ready for another?
jbramley at 12:13PM on 08/31/08
Hunger
Awakens
My empty
Belly rumbles with it’s
Urges, my mind
Races for rare, fresh
Ground sirloin and chuck
Evenly seared on an Onion
Roll!
JWFROMNJ at 1:00PM on 08/31/08
Cyprus sure, cheddar pure, purrrrr
Hot juicy halloumi
Effluence
Enticing me
Succulent meat sizzle
Excitement
Bubbling within me
Unctuous
Ribald
God it's good
Every time
Really
negtiveEclipse at 1:11PM on 08/31/08
Holy crap.
Amazing.
My
Burger
Understands me. Gets me.
Really caters to my most crucial of needs!
Great. Now I have to
Eat it. Goodbye
Rare friend.
crapkatapult at 1:17PM on 08/31/08
America's great grub
Meat perfectly seared
Envy of all pizzas
Roads bloom with them
In every corner
Cheese has no better friend
A hamburger today
Q80 BurgerBelly at 3:18PM on 08/31/08
Buns of steel ....hard or soft
Usual suspects .....ketchup and pickles
Red in the middle ....crispy sides
Great with fries ....or an onion or two
Excellent meal ....or tasty snack
Roundly firm .....or squished down flat
Loved by all ....except the vegans
I want one now .....another later
Chips are good ....inside the bun
I love burgers .....plain is great
One for hubby .....two for me
Use a grill ....or a dark fry pan
Spread the table ....burgers are done !
foodie51 at 5:47PM on 08/31/08
Hearty
And
Meaty
Best
Used
Really
Getting
Epicurian
Rapture
ladyballs at 6:53PM on 08/31/08
Best that you should
understand what to do with
real American chuck,
ground and formed then
expertly done
rare.
benzado at 9:44PM on 08/31/08
My submission is a trio of haiku:
Hot sizzling meat
Aroma from Heaven
Made to order
Backyard grilling joy
Urban high cuisine
Recreational imperative
Ground red meat
Eaten with joy in heart
Religious experience
KuyasKitchen at 12:03AM on 09/01/08
Just cooked to medium rare
Unctuous, luscious, melty cheese oozing over the top
Inside a fluffy bun
Condiments of choice, just enough to please
Yum!
dbcurrie at 12:12AM on 09/01/08
Heaven on a bun
Another one just cause the first tasted so good
Mary love of god ... are you putting what on that burger
Broiled over an open flame, cause we love the smoke
Unbelievable as a first bite, Sad and missed as a last bite
Right off the grill, juices running down your chin
Grinning ear to ear with that meat juice shiny smile after the first bite
Every bite is a great expierence
Ready for one more (the greatest words my dad ever said)
Lemoyne at 9:31AM on 09/01/08
Have
A
Melt-in-your-mouth
Bite of bliss. You can be daring and use
Unknown ingredients or stick with the
Regulars - cheese, bacon, mayo
Go now and create a burger and
Experience the flavor of beef.
Really, stop reading...go eat!
bevsclark at 10:19AM on 09/01/08
Cannot live without
Her…
Every time I say “love”
Evokes
Something
Else:
BURGERS! I LOVE CHEESEBURGERS!
Ultimate union of beef (juicy) cheese (gooey) bun (squishy)
Red, round, ridiculously right
Girl, I got to
Eat!
(Raises cheeseburger to mouth)
Sakura at 12:41PM on 09/01/08
Have
Another
Meaty
Bite!
Unsurprisingly
Robust
Good
Eats...
Really.
Moeyphil at 1:21PM on 09/01/08
Recipies,
Everybody has one, but
Doubt that
Mine can be topped
Even if your dad is a butcher
Add to a pound of premium ground beef
Three tablespoons of worstershire, carmelized
Onion and some bleu cheese, but
Not too much, enough for three patties
And throw them on a hot grill 'til they're almost
Black on the outside and slightly
Undercooked in the middle
Now that's good eatin'
pattyplus at 1:34PM on 09/01/08
Title:
H aving
A
Major
B reakdown
Understandably
R equires
G enerous
E picurean
R emedies
H aving a major breakdown in my ability to cope
A nother grim day of meaningless work
M ost of which serves the wrong master.
B rutal workplaces drive calorically desperate deeds.
U nder these circumstances, fortunately, one finds
R emedies at one’s fingertips, ranging from the rather
G raceless yet anatomically correct McDonald’s Double Cheeseburger,
E dible yet unsatisfying, to the
R apturous Ghetto Burger at Miss Ann’s Snack Bar in ATL.
jonnyboy at 4:59PM on 09/01/08
Hot off the grill
Add some catsup on top
Moist and delicious
Bun to hold it
Unless I am full, I will eat two
Real tasty
Great for lunch
Eat them whenever I can
Real crowd pleaser
Thank you!
janetfaye (at) gmail (dot) com
janetfaye at 5:31PM on 09/01/08
Finger
Licking
Ecologically
Sound
Hamburger
Yumminess
masha339 at 5:56PM on 09/01/08
Buy me a burger, the
Urge will never cease
Rare, any more cooked is criminal
Give me melted cheese on that
Eat it, I will and
Repeat often!
ESNY1077 at 7:58PM on 09/01/08
How I love
A good juicy
Medium rare burger.
Build it
Up inside the bun,
Reaching divinity,
Grilled to perfection.
Eat it and enjoy.
Ready?
fast_wheels at 10:52PM on 09/01/08
When an
Immediate burger craving
Meets a temporarily
Penurious financial situation,
You know what to say.
EatingInTranslation at 2:12AM on 09/02/08
Hey man!
Ahhh! Get back here with my burger!
Man that double cheeseburger cost me one
Buck!
U little thief! I hope you
Realize I know exactly who you are, that cape ain't foolin' no one!
Geez if your family saw you now they would
Lower their head in shame
Either that, or
Ronald would fire your ass
bulabooshy at 8:44AM on 09/02/08
Bursting with
Red goodness,
Every bite
A
Delicate symphony;
Aria of aroma.
Nothing compares.
Dreaming of
Meaty melodies
Enticing scents.
Apply
Tomato.
Stufsocker at 10:42AM on 09/02/08
M eat lovingly loose
E aten savoring
D ripping juices
I ncomparably beefy
U ndeniable comfort
M elted gooey cheese
R ed onion and bacon
A perfect bun to burger
R atio completes the quest
E xhalted Burger Rules!
gratefulted at 11:47AM on 09/02/08
Astonishing
Notable
In-n-out
Mouth-watering
Amazing
Lots of secret sauce
Seared griddled goodness
Tasty
Yearning
Left Coast and I live on the East Coast!
Every day I dream of getting there again...one day.
davey at 11:51AM on 09/02/08
B est eaten with some ketchup
U nder the radiance of summer light and next to the grill
R are and with melted cheese
G reets my mouth and transforms me to a
E uphoric state that brings
R apture and ecstasy. How fine!
foodinmouth at 11:57AM on 09/02/08
And we have our winners! The AHT/Serious Eats Crew liked the following:
sakuraa
The judges say: Holy moly! Points for length but more so for expressing how a great dish can cure homesickness.
davey
The judges say: We love In-N-Out. Way to play to our sympathy.
EatingInTranslation
The judges say: "I would gladly pay you Tuesday!" Clever. Very clever. Nice use of 50¢ words.
Sakura
The judges say: Girl, we got to eat, too!
crapkatapult
The judges say: You can't have your cake and eat it, too. We feel your pain, crapkatapult.
We'll be contacting you all to get shipping info!
Adam Kuban at 12:45PM on 09/02/08